Never

Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever told you 18 years ago that I would have the conversation I had tonight. Reece was tired from the fair last night and wanted to stay home from normal Wednesday youth. Yes youth. Crazy parents I know. It goes TOO FAST!  Hold on, lay down at night with them, take them for that coke they want to grab with you, paint toenails, and throw baseballs and softballs. Let them try out for whatever they want. It will go in the blink of an eye and you will be alone wondering what happened to the time. How. I'm already there.

Back to the conversation. :)
Reece ran with me to Market Street tonight grabbing groceries for the week. In the middle of the pasta, yogurt, and cream soda, she asked me something I never thought she was old enough to comprehend. (They tend to grow up overnight!)
Reece: "Mom. Can I ask you something?"
Me: "Sure thing."
Reece: "Do you remember where you were?"
Me: (thinking: yes. I answered this today on Jon Mark Hester's fb page. Anyone from Wayland remembers exactly where we were and what we were doing. We remember how we felt and the minute everything seemed to be collapsing around us.)   "I do remember. I was in biology class. Taking a test. The professor came in and turned the TV on and said you'll want to see this. We watched the headlines and smoking tower. Then he turned the TV off and said, Try to finish your exam and you can go. I went back to my dorm, Owen, with the other girls and waited for news in the lobby. It was a scary and uncertain day."
Reece: "Were you scared? I mean things like Pearl Harbor have happened. It's crazy."
Me: "Yes fear is always part of it. But I remember what we did as a campus that night. We gathered in the auditorium and prayed. We were on our faces asking God for peace. For control of air space. For Him to protect us all in the days ahead. We understood God already knew the future and He was the only one who could give us answers that day. And any day. You know that you can ask him anything? You know that He loves you right?"
Reece: "Yes. Mom how could you ever forgive someone for something like that? I watched a video today. A lady was on the plane that went down and she called her husband. She said they were fighting them off and taking down the plane. And to tell the boys she loved them. It was so sad mom!"
Me: (She got me there. Choking. Crying.) "Reece that is so sad. It's terrible. So many people lost their whole life that day. A day we should never forget. A day we remember to honor people and what honor and respect looks like.We must never forget no matter how much time passes. 16 firefighters who died that day. Their children became firefighters this year. They will never forget. That's what honor looks like."
Reece: "I know mom. But how to do you forgive someone for that?"
Me: "That may take time. We are not God. But that's what God asks us to do. To forgive. To not make ourselves sick with angry and bitterness and hate. To see the good in the bad. To find the light in the darkness. To be the light. To never let evil win out. Because of Jesus, it doesn't. Ever. Never forget that."


I was impressed she had the awareness to ask.

And right there, unplanned. We had church in the car. Jesus was present and real and made something tangible. She saw the tears and how much one remembers. She heard a lady's testimony in her final call and she woke up a little more to the world around her. She began to understand more that it doesn't revolve around her. Pain is real. But Jesus is very alive. That she knows. Talk to your kids this year. These stories are important to be told. They need us to lay busy down and hold their hand and pour into their hearts.