What a description tonight at youth that I've heard before but something stood out. Our fabulous youth director Jase was simply describing the crucifixion. Exactly how that would have taken place. The severity of the wounds, the pain. The hopeless and finality of hanging on a cross. And that's when I heard the word. He suffocated. Every breath was effort and pain and agony to get the next.
Interesting how sometimes in this world it can feel exactly like that. Like we are suffocating. Like it is effort to keep going, to breath. And that is NO laughing matter in this dirt filled air. Whether it is the literal air or the troubles and circumstances we find around ourselves, life can be flat suffocating if we let it become that. Oh how I take too much on at times and let the worry and over analyzation rob me of the peace that the Lord give us. I let the devil just plant the plow of doubt and till up a field I've been working hard to turn over to the Lord. I let the little enemy of "I'm not good enough" or "I didn't think through that hard enough" or SELF creep right in and down right suffocate me with "it is up to me." Oh how THAT goes against my little west Texas self. The little voice I was raised on screams, "you should have tried harder, worked longer, pulled yourself up by your bootstraps, etc...."
So all that was a simple reflection that just hit me square in the face when I heard the word suffocated. Well thank you JESUS that because you took my sin, my shame, I DO NOT HAVE to take it upon myself to be everything and do it all and think through every single situation. I DO NOT have to let this world and its troubles suffocate me of the life YOU have for me IN YOU. There are so many times and so many things that I let rob me, hold me back from the JOY I know is mine to claim. Thank you Jesus that You gave your life, your precious blood for me.
This may seem like a silly and simple example of someone giving something up for me lately but this is a very special example all the same. My husband and I are getting ready for a new adventure! He recently gave up his new truck and piece of Texas to allow us to get an all wheel drive to better serve us through the next adventure. Needless to say, when we left the truck I was crying as he drove off the lot in the new car. He told me, "Be happy. We have a new car!" Through the tears I sobbed, "I know. It's just hard to watch other people give special things up for me. Thank you."
Jesus gave up His life for me. (Cue the Kleenex!) That is the MOST precious gift. I will never fathom the meaning or the cost. The thought of the magnitude of what He did for me is overwhelming. I can't imagine what it would have been like to watch that day occur. The agony of watching someone die for me. It's hard enough for me to watch someone I love give something material up, but to watch my SAVIOR give his life. I hate watching anyone give something for me and usually I'm immediately the one who wants to take it upon myself because I don't feel worth the price for someone else to have to suffer or be unhappy. Christ gave. The thought is unbearable, the lump in my throat makes it hard to complete this sentence. Christ gave and stood in my place so that I didn't have to. WHAT A GIFT! I will remember that He suffocated and died for me so that I don't have to. He died so we could live and live abundantly! And I plan on living it abundantly for HIM. All the glory goes to HIM. Breathe deep, be thankful for the air that freely fills your lungs. Suffocate no more on the troubles of this life because CHRIST has overcome death. HE IS RISEN! And HE is COMING BACK!!
Happy Easter Ya'll!
